Minutes Like Hours
by twinb80
Summary: Norman and Iris look back on a past both want to forget.
1. Prologue

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Prologue

Norman tried to lay as still as possible as Iris went about rearranging the covers on his bed. She was going on about how busy Justin had become with his Temple of Jericho and how she would not be left behind.

"I am not a flea." She said with pride and a flash of arrogance.

No you are not, thought Norman, I know that know. For a brief moment Norman let his guard down and turned his gaze towards Iris. His eyes met hers and in that moment time seemed to move back to events Norman had not thought of in years. As if reading his mind Iris's eyes continued to bore into his. Acknowledging that she too rememeber the events and a time she truly wanted to forget that happened. Their exchange lasted only a few seconds and Norman cursed himself for letting his guard down. He thought to himself that Iris was truly the lion her mother had talked about. She would attack him if she felt threatened, no matter their past, and feel no regret or remorse for doing so. He knew that. He could not let her know how much strength he had really regained.

So Norman did the only thing he knew to distract Iris's attentive gaze of suspicion.

He wet himself.


	2. As I Lay Me Down to Sleep

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours **

By twinb80

Chapter One: As I Lay Me Down to Sleep

The house had become quiet as Norman lay under his covers. Iris had finally left him after changing his soiled cloths and Norman welcomed the quietness. And it yet feared it just the same. Justin could be anywhere in the house doing God knows what and to whom. Norman had heard the ambulance arrive and carry out the latest maid Justin had gone through. He had tried with all his capabilities to try and rise out of his bed when he heard the Bishop talking to Iris. Unfortunately that had been a lost cause since the Bishop didn't even come to say hello to him. This hurt Norman for he and Bishop McNaughton had been good friends and to have the man barely acknowledge him was truly a slap in the face. Norman's pride had also taken a blow from his encounter with Iris soon there after. At least now she was gone. For how long Norman didn't know but he welcomed her absence.

When did she become his enemy and not his daughter? Norman could honestly say he did not see these events coming. Even if the Lord himself had told him that the man he raised as a his own son would turn out to be a Demon and the girl he had loved as his own flesh and blood daughter would one day turn on him he wouldn't have believed it. Wouldn't believe that such a betrayal would ever take place. And yet here it was. Betrayed by those he had saved in that forest so many years ago. Norman's eyes began to tear and he allowed himself this indulgence to mourn the loose of his "children". Thank the Lord his wife hadn't lived to see this day. It would truly have killed her. For she loved Justin and Iris as if they were her own. Just like Norman had. As the tears flowed silently down his cheeks Norman looked back into the past and into himself. And he finally admitted that he a Reverend and father figure, had loved Iris more than just a daughter at one point in his life.


	3. Cold and Lonely

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours **

By twinb80

Chapter Two: Cold and Lonely

Iris sat at her vanity table running a brush through her hair. She smiled to herself as she recalled the scene earlier that night at the Temple Of Jericho. Justin had given yet another wonderful speech to the people gathered there. His strong voice had echoed out across the tent and across the airwaves. The people gathered there had stood and cheered at his words. Iris's heart had swelled with pride. For it was her brother and no other man that the people had come to see and hear. These people had been tossed aside by others who did not want to see their poverty. Who did not want to see the saddened and worn down looks or the faces or hear the children cry out in hunger. No one had wanted to help them, only Justin had. Justin and herself had reached out to these people and they were rewarded back with pure devotion. For they were lost sheep and had found the promise land in Justin as their shepherd.Even Norman had been enthralled with Justin's message.

Iris frowned.

Norman.

Norman was going to be a problem and Iris did not welcome this thought at all. She continued to brush her hair as she recalled the day's events. Bishop McNaughton had stopped by to say a few words to Justin and had ended up staying for breakfast. As he was leaving Iris heard Norman fall out of his bed and had gone to help him. The movements of Iris's brush became erratic as she remembered how she had told Norman that she would not be left behind in the wake of Justin's new path. And for expressing that thought out loud Norman had with one glance thrown her past out at her. Iris slammed her hairbrush down onto the vanity table. She stood up and began pacing her room and with each thought she became madder. How dare he throw her past out like that. Especially after everything she and Justin had done for him. They had brought him here to live with them like any good children would do for their guardian. Justin had even made special arrangements so that Norman would not feel left out in the services at the Temple of Jericho. How dare he throw her past in her face. Her past was her own business and no one else's. She answered to no one and especially not to a person who had played such a part in it. Iris suddenly stopped pacing and sat down upon her bed. She wrapped her arms around herself as she reluctantly allowed past memories to come back to her. Memories of a time in her life that she had tried so hard in vain to forget suddenly came rushing back over her.


	4. Happy Birthday to You

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Three: Happy Birthday to You

The year was 1915 and Iris Crowe was about to celebrate her 27th birthday. She had been working as a maid in an upscale inn and for once did not have to work a Saturday afternoon. This was because she had requested the day off for her birthday. When she had applied for the job years before Norman and Rose had been surprised. They had told her that she didn't need to work to pay them back for taking her and Justin in as children. But Iris had been firm in her decision to work outside of the home. She had wanted to pay for Justin's schooling and would not accept any outside help.

A few months earlier, Justin had celebrated his 21st birthday and had started an internship under Norman's watchful eye. Iris took pride in the fact that she had worked so hard to put Justin through school and without anyone's help either. She had even been able to put some money aside and had begun a savings account for herself and Justin. She should have been happy since her brother was coming home from Divinity school to help her celebrate with Norman, Rose and some close friends. She should have been happy but she wasn't. A dark cloud had come over her and she could not shake it or come out from under it.

She still lived in the same house Norman had brought Justin and herself to as children. The two story house had original belonged to a family who had six children. When those children had grown up and moved away Norman Balthus had bought the house from the former owners. By 1900, when Iris and Justin had come to live there they were the only children left in the neighborhood. Pacing their living room she recalled how strange life had been for them then. She had only recently turned 12 years old and had lost her mother in a terrible train accident. Her brother had only been six years old at the time and had not spoken an once of English. Since Iris had been tutored a little in English back home, she became Alexei's translator.

Alexei.

Only Iris called him that. She was the only one who knew his true name. When Norman had found them Iris had given him the names her mother told to tell strangers. Justin and Iris Crowe. And Iris was who she had become. Who she had to become so that her beloved Alexei would be safe from those who wished to harm him and her. Iris stopped her pacing and sat down on the piano stool. She began to play a song her mother had taught her that she had never forgotten. Along with the playing she hummed the words. Waiting for Norman to return with Justin.

Her thoughts ran to the party guest list and she found herself wanting more than anything to call her birthday party off all together. She did not want to see people and to fake being happy when the fact was she was not happy. She would try and be polite because Norman and Rose had made such a big deal about her birthday party. But she was not welcoming being around other people. Especially people like Allan Bakerson who had taken it upon himself to be her suitor. Iris sighed. In reality, the only person she wanted to see at her party was Justin. She welcomed hearing his news and being in his presence. Her darling brother had grown up to be quite a handsome man and would probably be catching some young girl's eye soon if he hadn't already.

Iris stopped her playing. This thought had not cheered her up at all. What would the future hold for her without Justin? Iris had never really stopped to think about that situation. And when she did, she became more hollow with each passing moment. This could not happen. They could not be separated. Their mother had told them to stay together no matter the cost. They were in this together after all. Just as Iris was about to tell Rose to call the party off she heard the front door open. Justin's voice called out "Where's the birthday girl?" Just hearing his voice made Iris's spirits soar and she raced to the front door to greet her brother.


	5. Make a Wish

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Four: Make a Wish

The birthday party had been going strong for the last hour or so. The house was filled with the laughter and talk of its numerous guest, which included many of Iris's co-workers, the Balthus's church going friends and even some of Justin's school friends had made the trip to celebrate Iris's birthday. On the outside Iris appeared to be happy and the life of the party. She talked with each guest making them feel welcomed and thanked them for her gifts. There was music being played throughout the house and couples were dancing in the living room. Iris stood back watching the scene in front of her eyes. On the inside, she was still feeling cold from that dark cloud and she only seemed to come out of it when she was near Justin's side. He had become the life of the party and a small crowd of friends and adults had centered themselves around him so that they could better hear Justin's stories from school and his internship. Iris smiled to herself. Her brother it seemed had finally decided to try and shed that part of him that was shy around others.

Growing up it had really just been the two of them that each other could talk to. Iris thought back more on the past. Coming to America had indeed been a strange trip and adjusting to life had been difficult at times. Norman and Rose had taken them out of the orphanage and into their home with loving arms. For that Iris was grateful. They had treated and loved them like their very own children. At six years of age, Justin had still needed to be held and protected. At twelve, Iris had taken on that role and, in doing so, had distanced herself from any adults around. It wasn't that she did not come to love and honor Norman and Rose as her parental figures. She did but no one would take the place of her mother and father. Even if her father was an "evil man" and her mother was dead. She was grateful that Norman and Rose had recognized this and had never pressed the issue. But just because they had never questioned her about her parents didn't mean that others hadn't tried.

Iris's mind raced back to the not too distant past as the party continued around her. Since Iris and Justin wouldn't talk about their parents or their lives before coming to live with the Balthus other children had taken it upon themselves to call Justin and herself bastards behind their backs. Iris had not found this out till they attended the annual Methodist Church Picnic. It had been just a few months after they had come to live in America. Rose had been trying to teach Iris to cook, since she had never learned. Why should she have when back home there had been a cook to do that for them? But Iris said none of this to Rose. Not even that, back home, she had been privately tutored and had never gone to a public school. Or that she had been given lessons in singing, playing the piano, needle work, and ballet classes. Nor that was her other life that ended the night her mother died.

Norman and Rose could not afford the lessons she had been given in Russia. In Russia she had been taught how to be a Lady and all that went with it. Here in America she was just a young immigrant girl who spoke a little more English than most. The church picnic had been going well and Iris had stuck by Rose's side most of the day. She had also kept an eye on her brother, but he had ran off with some boys his age only a few minutes earlier. As Iris was putting out the dishware to eat with, Justin came running up to her tears streaming down his face. He looked like he had been pushed in to the dirt and his new pants were covered in dirt and grass. Iris had immediately ran to him and asked what was wrong.

Through his hurried Russian, Justin had let her know that Robert and James Langefield had pushed him down and called him names when he couldn't respond to their questions in English. Iris looked around the picnic area and could not see Rose or Norman anywhere. She took her brother's hand and asked him where the other boys were. They had been playing nearby the swings with the other children. Iris marched over to the playground and spotted Robert and James right away. They had seen her coming and began to snicker amongst themselves. Iris asked in halting English why they had treated her brother so badly. This only made the boys laugh harder and this made the other children take notice. Iris became more upset with each passing moment. How dare they laugh at her! Did they know who she was who her brother was!

"Stop laughing. And tell me what you asked my brother." she yelled at them. The children were taken back her outburst but soon fell into more laughter. Justin tugged at the sleeve of her dress and whispered the one word he could remember. Iris's eyes became enlarged and she screamed out "We are not bastards!" Robert and James laughed harder. At that moment, Laura Tolken who was a schoolmate, and did not like Iris shouted out, "Of course you are! That's what an orphan is...a bastard! I bet you don't even have the same Dad do ya!"

Justin began to cry as the other children snickered behind their hands. Iris stood there with her eyes blazing. How dare this snot of girl call her a bastard in one breath and then insult her mother's good name in the next. "That's a lie," Iris said between clenched teeth. Laura took one look at Iris's face and laughed harder. Before she knew what was happening, she had let go of Justin's hand and tackled Laura to the ground. For a moment no one spoke and then the air was filled with the children's shouts and screams of "Fight Fight Fight".

The adults nearby heard the screams and come running to find Reverend Balthus's new adoptive daughter and Laura Tolken rolling around in the dirt clawing at each other's faces. The surrounding children were still shouting and the younger ones were crying. Justin just stood there with shock written across his young face as Iris repeatedly hit and clawed at Laura's face. Even some of the adults were taken aback at the scene of the young girl filled with such anger shouting in a foreign tongue. The fight had ended when Norman had picked her up from the ground and told her to stand still or else. Laura Tolken tried to stand up but couldn't. Everyone could then see what damage Iris had done to her. She had blood running down her face from a broken nose, a black eye was forming and her dress was ruined.

Iris had fared a little better and had only ruined her dress and gotten a few scratches on her face. Her hair had fallen out of its ribbon but she didn't care. Before any adult could say anything Iris wrenched free of Norman's hold on her. She was still breathing hard from the fight. She looked Laura Tolken in the eye and said one thing: "Never say a word about my Mother again." And with that she grabbed Justin's hand and left the crowd of adults and children behind speechless.

The memory ended and Iris was once again in their living room. Eventually she had made friends growing up, but had never really been close to any of those friends. What Norman and Rose couldn't understand was that Iris didn't want to be close to anyone but Justin. And she thought he felt the same way to. She knew he did. Iris continued to watch her brother as he drew the crowd around in with story after story. She knew in her heart that he would make a good speaker one day, and that when he finally realized his destiny, this speaking ability would help them in the end. But that time was not now. Justin had no idea that he had a special destiny awaiting him. But Iris knew. And she promised herself everyday that she would do what ever she had to do to make sure Justin reached that destiny.


	6. Looking Back

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours **

By twinb80

Chapter Five: Looking Back

The party had gone on late into the evening the last remaining guests were leaving. Norman Balthus sat down in his favorite easy chair, recalling the night's festivities. Justin had charmed everyone there and Norman took pride in being his guardian. He couldn't believe that it had been 15 years since the children had come to live with them. The years had flown by and now his children were all grown up. Justin had done well in public school, considering his language barrier in the beginning. It was not until he began attending Divinity School that he really began to shine. He was eager to learn and Norman had become his mentor as well as his guardian. From his sitting position, Norman could see Rose and Iris washing the party dishes and putting them away. Norman frowned. Iris, he could tell, although polite to her guests, had not wanted to be there. Norman could not understand this. The parties in the past Rose and he had given her had always met with joy and happiness. Why was this birthday any different Norman pondered the question some more. He had caught glimpses of Iris at the party and what he had seen was not happiness. Norman could not come up with a satisfactory answer to this problem.

Looking back, Iris had always been a happy person, if not a distant one. Even with all the warmth and love Rose and he had bestowed on her, there was still a wall there. Justin, it seemed, was the only one Iris allowed to get close to her. They were close and sometimes Norman thought a little too close. But that was easily explained away by the strange and horrible circumstances surrounding their orphaning. Norman had watched the children grow up and he thanked the Lord everyday for bringing them into his life. Justin was surely headed for greatness within the Church and Iris had grown up to be a wonderful young woman. Norman had seen Allan Bakerson at the party and knew that he fancied her. Everyone in town thought it would be a good match between Iris and Allan. Allan had come to their town two years previously and taught English at the local high school. He also attended First Methodist and that is where he had first met Iris at a church picnic. The only one who seemed to not think it was a good match was Iris. Norman did not understand this. Allan Bakerson was educated and well liked. And, truth be told, Iris was not getting any younger. Not that she was losing her looks or anything. Norman considered Iris to be pretty with her bright blue eyes and fiery red hair. He sometimes forgot that there was only really a sixteen-year age gap between them. His relationship with Iris had been more like a friendship than a father-daughter one. No, she had been easy to love as a child, but not so easy to get close to. With Justin, Norman felt that he truly had a solid father-son bond with. He was grateful for that. Rose and he had tried to have children of their own, but were never blessed. Not until Norman had found and saved Justin and Iris in that dark forest not so long ago. Adopting them and bringing them into their family had cemented the need Norman felt for a family.

He was truly blessed to have them.

The weekend hurried by, and it was Monday again. Norman was taking Justin back to his school and Rose had decided to go along with them. She had been invited to visit with nearby friends and welcomed the opportunity to do so. At age forty, Rose felt that her life was at a crossroads and was trying to find herself. Norman thought this would be a good idea. The Balthuses had been husband and wife for so long that, along with their church duties, they had never really been apart for very long. In this respect, they had never been able to expand as individuals, and Rose was now feeling suffocated. She did not blame Norman. On the contrary, he had been kind and respectful towards her. They just needed a little breathing room right now. Norman wondered secretly if she still loved him. He still loved her and had tried to be understanding concerning her wishes. They had tried to not let Justin and Iris see this other side to their relationship. So Rose was off to visit mutual friends of theirs to get away from everyday life. Iris was the only one who remained behind. She had work that needed to be done at the Inn since she wasn't there on Saturday. Rose and Norman left Justin and Iris to say their goodbyes privately. The beauty of their neighborhood greeted them as they waited on the front porch. Justin and Iris's partings were always like this. Quiet and private. And though the Balthuses could not understand the need for this, they still respected their children's wishes. Not that it didn't bother them. It did. But that was just the way things were. Some times Norman thought that he didn't know Justin and Iris at all. Even after seeing them everyday, they sometimes appeared like strangers to him. Justin finally opened the door and walked silently to the car. Norman and Rose followed him and they got into the car. No one spoke until Norman pulled the car onto the main street and they were heading out of town.


	7. We All Fall Down

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Six: We All Fall Down

Later that night, Norman returned home without Rose. She had decided to extend her visit and stay the night with their friends. The invitation had been extended to Norman, but he had declined, saying that he had to get home to catch up on some church related work. That was true since they had spent the weekend celebrating Iris's birthday and visiting with Justin. He had driven home and only stopped once for gas. When he reached home he saw the front porch light and parlor lights had been turned on. Iris, he thought, must have come home earlier from work than she had planned. Norman let himself in the back door and was surprised to find that the rest of the house lights weren't turned on. Usually, when Iris returned from work, she had the radio playing, but silence only greeted Norman.

He slowly made his way through the dark down the hallway and found Iris in the parlor room asleep on the couch. Norman was a little taken back at the sight. Asleep, Iris looked younger than she appeared awake. She had already changed into her robe and nightgown and was curled up on the couch. Her long auburn hair flowed down her back. When was the last time he had seen her with her hair down instead of up like all the latest fashion crazes? Norman could not recall. Instead, he decided that the best thing to do would be to turn off the lamps in the room and to bring Iris a blanket, since she had decided to sleep there. He walked over to the nearest lamp and began turning them off. He was just about done when he heard Iris behind him stir in her sleep. The noise had started Norman and he turned around to see if anything was wrong. What greeted him was a surprise. Iris was still asleep but she had stretched herself out of the fetal position and Norman could see that her feet were bare. Her movement had also loosed her robe around her body and Norman could see the shape of her breasts lying against the fabric of her modest nightgown. He was taken back by the sight. Iris appeared to be someone else laying there.

He continued to stare at her sleeping form. "Stop thinking like that." he told himself. This woman before him was his adoptive daughter and as such she trusted him completely. He shouldn't be having these thoughts go through his mind or look at her that way. He was a married man, not to mention a man of the cloth too. He willed the thoughts running through his mind to stop but they didn't listen to him. His feet wouldn't obey him either. Instead they stayed rooted to the floor as image upon image floored his mind. Why was he thinking like this? He had known Iris almost all of her life and yet the woman lying before him didn't look like her. This woman was someone that had aroused his sense merely lying there on the couch.

Norman continued to stare at Iris's sleeping form. When he had finally worked up the courage to walk out of the room Iris opened her eyes. Norman froze fearing what her eyes would tell her when she saw him standing there. Would she guess at what had been running through his mind and become disgusted with him? Norman hoped not and yet at this moment he hoped she could read his mind. Norman forced himself to look her in the eye. But instead of disgust her eyes held nothing but concern for him. Neither said anything. Finally, Iris asked him if had eaten dinner on his way home. Norman managed to tell her he had. She then asked if he would like some tea before returning to his office to work. He managed again to nod his head yes and she got up from the couch and went into the kitchen.

Norman's body collapsed onto the couch as he repeatedly berated himself for thinking such lewd thoughts about Iris. What was wrong with him? Was he crazy? He didn't know. He just knew that she had caused something in him to stir merely laying there. Iris came back from the kitchen with the tea set and handed Norman a cup. He lifted his head fearing what he found in her eyes. He had seen the look of recognition at how he appeared. It was only there a moment but Norman had seen it. Would she slap his face now? Part of Norman hoped she would. To slap some sense into him. She merely looked at him as usual as he accepted the cup she offered. She sat down next to him and Norman thought it would be better for her if she ran to her room and locked him out. Such were the force of his thoughts he couldn't shake.

They both sat there and finally got around to talking about mundane things. Work, Church and Justin, of course. Norman was almost feeling back to his old self when Iris asked him where Rose was. Silence was the only answer given. Iris could tell by this that Rose had decided to stay over at her friend's house. She sighed. Poor Norman and Rose had devoted so much time and energy to Justin and herself. That by now they had not had the time to grow as individuals and as a couple. Iris looked down at her hands. The fact that Justin and her still lived at home didn't help matters. Iris could see that. That was one of the reasons she worked so hard at the Inn. She wanted to be able to give Norman and Rose the time and space they needed to reconnect and not have to worry so much about her and Justin. Iris had planned to be able to do this by saving enough money so that Justin and her could afford a home of their own.

She looked back up at Norman and was surprised to find him staring at her. She couldn't tell what he wanted to say but she could feel what he wanted from her. The shock of this was that what he wanted from her did not disgust her. In fact she welcomed this news. She had always been able to feel what others could not say. As a small child she thought everyone could do this and was shocked when she learned that this wasn't true. The person she had the strongest connection with this gift was Justin. He had never had to ask her for anything. She had always known what he wanted. She couldn't explain it. She just knew.

"Iris...I..."

"Shh...don't say anything."

Neither spoke as Iris moved closer to Norman and placed her hands against his face. Norman closed his eyes as she leaned toward he until their foreheads were touching. He could smell the mint tea on her breath as she breathed slowly against his face. This is wrong, he thought. She should slap my face and run to her room right now. She should be yelling and hitting me to get away. But she didn't. Norman opened his eyes and was surprised to see longing reflected back at him. She returned his stare and continued to say nothing. Instead she allowed herself to brush her lips against his. Norman closed his eyes again as the sensation of her light kiss went through his body. Why wasn't she running from him? He found that he didn't care as he kissed her back. Norman was shocked to find that Iris was kissing him back with as much passion as he felt. He forced his tongue into her mouth as she wrapped her arms around him. He in return wrapped his arms around her and gently lied her back onto the couch. He seemed to see himself as if from a distance away and could not believe that this was happening. But it was. Norman's hands found the opening to her robe and quickly did away with it. The buttons of her nightgown soon revealed her breasts to him. Iris's breath had become hurried and she gasped out loud as Norman's mouth began to ravish her body. She automatically placed her legs around his waist as he began to grind against her. All thoughts of right and wrong and sin flew out of Norman's head as his body reacted to hers. She arched her back as his hands pulled her nightgown up and he began to kiss her neck.

Suddenly one thought ran this his head. Was she a virgin? That thought sent him realing back to a sitting position. Iris lay beneath him her breath still haggard. He couldn't hurt her in that manner. As much as he wanted her right then he knew he couldn't do that to her. As if reading his mind, Iris spoke up. "You wont hurt me. Not like that." Norman was shocked. Had he spoke his thought out loud? He knew he hadn't and yet her she was giving him an answer. The Iris before him was not the Iris he thought he knew. Had that suitor of hers, Allan Bakerson, finally caught her and taken her to bed? Norman found he didn't want to know the answer. Instead he watched as Iris sat up and brought her hands to his shirt. She unbuttoned his shirt and her hands were soon on his bare chest. She looked up at him and his sense of sanity left him. He gathered her in his arms and their bodies soon tumbled backwards onto the couch. Neither heard the hallway clock chime condemning their actions.


	8. Calling All Cars

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Seven: Calling All Cars

The next morning Norman awoke to find himself in the guest bedroom downstairs. The night came rushing back to him and he cringed as he remembered how he let his lust get the better of him. Some time in the night, he and Iris had moved their love making to this room. As he looked around the room, the images of the night before came back to haunt him. He saw them rolling around on the bed and saw Iris's face before him. The room had echoed with their moans. Since no one else had been in the house they had been as loud as they wanted to be.

Blood filled Norman's face as he recalled the look of pleasure on her face as he came within her. Had she called out his name? He didn't remember if she had or not. He was grateful that they hadn't ended up in her childhood room or in his bedroom. That was the only thing he was grateful for about last night. He had sunk down into depravity and ruined Iris's good name in the process. How would she treat him now? How would she look at him now? How did he face his wife when she returned home? Or Justin for that matter?

Justin. Norman shuddered at the thought of Iris telling Justin what had happened between them. And she would. They told each other everything. Norman knew that. He closed his eyes, praying to never be able to open them again. But his prayer went unanswered .He finally decided to look to the right side of the bed where Iris had fallen asleep. He was surprised to find she wasn't there. Why would she be? She had probably woken up and ran from him and this room. Norman did not blame her. The clock in the hallway chimed eight times, letting Norman know he should be up and out of bed by now. He got out of the bed and quickly made his way back to his bedroom. There he showered and put on clean clothes. But he still felt unclean from the night before. Not that their little affair the night before hadn't been wonderful. It had been and Iris had surprised him more. She appeared to be another person entirely during the course of the night. And Norman had responded to this young passionate person who lay before him.

But now he dreaded seeing how Iris would react to him now. He could hear her moving around downstairs. No doubt preparing breakfast for him, herself and Rose. _My God. Rose._ She would be home any minute and Norman dreaded facing her. He would have to tell her what had happened between Iris and himself. He could not lie to her. He owed her that much. And if she left him then he would accept that. He would have to. Norman Balthus knew he had no other choice to make. So he quietly exited his bedroom and went downstairs.


	9. For We All Sin

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Eight: For We Will Sin

The morning sunlight echoed throughout the kitchen windows as Norman entered the room. Iris had already set the table for breakfast and was currently standing in front of the stove scrambling eggs. Her back was to him, but he knew that she had heard him come in. Norman quietly sat down at the kitchen table, waiting for her to speak. The radio was playing a song that Norman could not place. Iris still did not turn say anything. Norman took the opportunity to study her. She had pulled her hair up back up into a French braid that ended in a bun at the base of her neck. The clothes she wore were practical for work and were accented by the necklace Iris had taken to wearing constantly. Norman's eyes continued to study her form, and he soon realized that he still wanted her.

Shame filed his entire body and mind. Before coming downstairs, he had berated himself repeatedly for last night. He had tried to convince himself that their lovemaking the night before had been a one-time event. Now he wasn't so certain. As if sensing his unasked question, Iris turned around. Norman's breath caught in his throat. She still resembled the Iris he had made love to. Here standing before him was the passionate woman whose body had given him much pleasure. She continued to say nothing as she placed the scrambled eggs onto his plate. The song on the radio changed as Iris sat down in the chair next to him. Norman felt like he had been bewitched and cursed at the same time. Why had his thoughts toward her turned from fatherly to wanton lust? Perhaps it was because he was afraid that Rose didn't love him anymore. Maybe it was his age. What were people calling it - a midlife crisis? Yes, that's the term Norman had heard. But he had never stopped to think that he would be going through a midlife crisis. Especially with Iris of all people. Yet here it was. They continued to eat their breakfast in silence. Norman finally broke the silence when he asked the question he most dreaded the answer to.

"Are you going to tell Justin about last night?"

Iris turned her head to look at him with shocked eyes. Amazingly, she had never thought to tell Justin about last night. It would have hurt him beyond reason, and Iris did not want to do that to him. She did not care if he became disgusted with her actions. But purposely hurting him was not an option. Her dark cloud that had been following her around for days had disappeared while she was in Norman's arms. She did not stop to think why that was why she had acted not like herself last night or why she welcomed not being herself if for only a few hours. Besides, last night had only concerned her and Norman and no one else.

"No, I wont tell him. Will you tell Rose?"

It was Norman's turn to be shocked at the same question. Shocked because he found that he didn't want to tell his wife about their affair. The entire time upstairs, he had tried to convince himself that it was the right thing to do. And as a Reverend he knew that his actions with Iris had damned his soul. This information should have made him more concerning about telling Rose. But he didn't want to. Part of him knew he was being a selfish asshole. But he didn't care. Not right then not at that moment.

"No, I am not going to tell her."

Iris smiled and was grateful that others would not get involved with this mess they had created. It was hard enough for her to go on day in and day out since her birthday and she didn't need any other problems intruding. Just as they were about to say more to one another, they heard a car pull up to the house, and Rose's voice called out to them. They went out to greet her, and found that she had brought her friends she had stayed with and their children. It had been decided that Ray and Lucy Donalds and their children would be coming to visit with them this time.

"Isn't it great Norman?" Rose asked. "This way I can still visit with Lucy, and you can spend time with Ray catching up on all your news."

Norman just smiled at Rose, and walked over to the car to help bring the luggage inside. Rose had been so happy for her extended little vacation, that she did not notice the look on Iris's face. _Where were these people going to stay?_ Iris thought. The house was big enough for everyone. That wasn't the problem. The problem was that Iris hadn't had time to clean the guest room that her and Norman had used. The bed sheets still needed to be taken off and cleaned and she didn't know when she would be able to do this. She was supposed to be at work in half in hour. Fortunately, she was saved from this problem by Rose telling her to go put on clean sheets in the guest bedroom while the Donalds and Balthus converged on the kitchen. Iris went back into the house with lighting speed and got the guest room ready in record time. She had opened the window to let in fresh air and even dusted the vanity table for Lucy. Just as she was leaving the house for work, she ran into Norman in the back of the hallway. No one else was inside, but Iris still felt like there were eyes watching her. She tried to walk past Norman, but he caught her arm, holding her close to him. She looked up into his face, and found that he wanted to ask her something. Too afraid that his voice would echo down the hallway, he whispered his question in her ear. Iris's face became flushed, but she merely nodded her head in answering him. Norman let go of her arm and she quickly made her way out the front door and to the Inn.


	10. Choices

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Nine: Choices

The Donalds ended up staying with them for two weeks. And to Iris's amazement, she actually enjoyed them being in her home. Ray and Lucy Donalds always seemed to have a story to tell or a joke they had just heard that needed to be told. Their children were well mannered and never threw a fit to get their heart's desires. Even Justin, home on the weekends, had been charmed by their family. Iris found the time spent with the Donalds to be a gift to her. In just one night, she had made a major life choice in going to bed with Norman, and found that she did not regret this choice. In his arms, she had found her escape from whatever it was she was running from. Iris did not want to stop and think about what she was running from - so she didn't.

Having the Donalds in the house for so long also helped Iris get past on of her greatest fears. Her period had been late in coming and the possibility that she might be pregnant terrified her. Thankfully, her period had been a week late in coming, but until it came Iris was scared to death. She knew that if the Donalds had not been visiting, the chance that Norman and her going to bed again and her ending up pregnant would have been twice as high. Norman had asked her in that darkened hallway if she wanted to continue their affair form the night before. Her face had turned bright red at, such a thought, but she still had said yes to his question. Now she was concerned about the possibility of becoming pregnant. If she ended up with a baby, she didn't know what she would do. She could endure the ridicule and taunts thrown at her as an unwed mother and being considered a harlot. She could deal with hidden smiles and smirks behind people's backs and being gossiped about. She would even endure the disappointment from Rose and Norman. No, it wasn't Norman she was concerned about either. It was having to tell Justin that she was pregnant. That she would be carrying another man's child and that man being Norman would be twice a blow to Justin. No, she couldn't tell Justin if that happened. If he found out that the father of her child was Norman he would kill Norman. Iris knew that. No, this affair had to stop before the possibility of her ending up with a child became a reality.

The Donalds had finally left, and Iris found her opportunity to talk with Norman privately one afternoon. Rose had gone into town to do some shopping and wouldn't be back until later that night. Justin was still in school, so it was the perfect time to talk with Norman. She found him in his office going over some paper work. He looked up to find her standing in the doorway like a lost child. She said nothing until she reached his desk and then it was in one quick rushed sentence. "So you see, I can't...we can't...I mean...it won't work out..."

Norman had been sitting in his chair, patiently listening to Iris's concerns. He gently took her hand and pulled her onto his lap. Startled, Iris looked up at him and found him smiling at her. He wasn't upset like she thought he would be, and explained to her that the chance of her becoming pregnant by him was next to impossible. "I don't understand. You're a man and I am a woman. What else do you need to make a baby?"

Norman chuckled at her question and Iris began to get upset. Did he think she was stupid? Some stupid little girl who had never had a lover? She wasn't as gullible or as innocent as she appeared to be. But that wasn't any of Norman's or anyone else's business. She tried to stand up but he held her tightly to him. One of his arms was wrapped around her waist while the other hand lay gently in her lap. She struggled some more and hit at him with her fists and shoes. "What do you want from me? I am not stupid, you know, and I don't like being made fun of!" she yelled at him.

After her little fit was over, Norman let go of his hold on her. She stood up and turned to leave the room. He caught her wrist and turned her back toward him. He didn't speak until she stopped struggling and looked him in the eye. "I am sorry I laughed at you. You're right about how anyone can make a baby. Its a valid concern. But you don't have to worry about that. I can't make babies. It's not Rose's fault, it's mine. I've even been tested, and it's my fault. I would never have asked you to continue this affair if I thought you might end up pregnant." Iris didn't know what to say to this information. He could be lying to her just to get her back into bed with him. She studied his face and found no clues that he was lying to her. Her gut feeling agreed with this. He had spoken the truth and as embarrassing as it had been for him, he still told her. He stood up from his chair and closed the small distance between them. Norman put his hands gently on the side of her face and she closed her eyes as he brought his mouth down onto hers. His arms were soon around her waist and his body pressed against hers. The thought that Rose could come home earlier never entered Norman's mind as his hands explored her body. Iris found herself returning his kisses and her desire to be satisfied grew. Norman's kisses soon find their way to her neck and she gasped out loud as he hefted her up onto his desk. His hands soon had her skirt pulled up to her waist, and the buttons on her blouse soon revealed her breasts to his eager eyes and hands. Within minutes, his pants were on the floor and their bodies were once again brought together in their forbidden act. His office echoed with their lovemaking and her legs were soon wrapped tightly around his waist as he came within her calling out her name.


	11. Music Lessons

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Ten: Music Lessons

Iris closed the door to room 15 at the Inn. In her hands she carried a basket filled with fresh towels for the guests. The Inn had been having a successful season and the rooms were filed with important guests and their families. She had been at work since eight that morning ad was looking forward to leaving early at four that afternoon. It had been three months since she began an affair with Norman. And so far he had been right concerning her fear of becoming pregnant. Her monthly visitor had always come on schedule and she was never late like that time before.

As she headed down the hallway she quietly hummed a song to herself. Singing had always been an outlet for her as a child growing up in the Church. As a young girl singing had also filled the gap in her lessons from living in Russia. She had been fortunate a month after the fight with Laura Tolken to continue her piano lessons. Rose had found her at the family's piano playing a piece her Mother had taught her. Iris had thought Rose was outside hanging laundry to try and had taken the opportunity to sneak playing a song. Iris did not think that Rose would become upset with her for playing the piano. But she knew that even playing the piano might make Rose suspicious of her past. Instead, Rose had in fact been surprised and astonished when she walked back into the house and found Iris playing. By age twelve, Iris had taken lessons for the past seven hours and her teacher had considered her playing to be above age level. The piano and singing had been two of her favorite lessons growing up in Russia. Rose had been so taken with her playing that she had signed her up for more lessons the next day.

Her lessons had continued for a few more years and now she found them coming in handy. Her manager Mr. Williams had asked her to give private lessons to two young girls staying at the end. The girls come from a prominent East Coast family and were staying at the Inn while their Father was on business. Iris had been surprised when Mr. Williams had asked her earlier that in the week. He had quickly explained that he had heard through the grapevine that she could play at an advanced level and wondered if she would like to pass on her knowledge. He had also explained to her that he had heard that she was working to pay for her brother's schooling and had figure that a little extra income might help matters along. Iris had been taken back by the request but she quickly thanked him for thinking of her. Giving piano lessons would bring her some extra income towards Justin's schooling and having a home of their own.

Iris quickly made her way downstairs and dropped the laundry basket off with another on of the workers. She had just enough time to tidy herself up before heading over to the Inn's ballroom. There she found 12 year old Lisa and 10-year-old Beth Lennox waiting for her. The girls were well mannered and Iris found them to be a delight to be around. They were eager students and found their lessons to be fun. The next hour found Iris teaching the girls a new song with an occasional guest stopping by the ballroom. Since the guests never said anything, Iris had let the matter slide. Her co-workers had stopped by in the beginning as if her playing was a foreign ability she had suddenly acquired. Their questioning faces had made Iris wonder who had informed Mr. Williams of her playing. But since her co-workers never said anything it was another matter she let slide. The lesson was almost over when Lisa began to giggle. She had been sitting in a chair patiently waiting as Beth sat next to Iris on the piano bench learning new notes. Iris did not look up as Lisa continued to giggle into her hand. Without looking up Iris finally asked her what was so funny. The question made her giggle some more and set Beth into motion as well.

"Lisa...your lesson is almost over...can this wait? What is so funny?" Iris asked again.

"That man over there is staring at you." Lisa said pointing to the doorway.

Startled Iris turned towards the doorway part of her fearing to find Norman there. She let out a small sigh as her eyes landed on Justin and she smiled at him. Her smile made the girls giggle more and iris rolled her eyes.

"Ok girls. Your lesson time is up. Would you like to meet my brother over there?"

The girls looked at one another and nodded their heads. Iris took each by the hand and walked over to Justin. Introductions were next and the girls suddenly became shy. Lisa looked down at her shoes while Beth continued to stare at Justin, eyes wide. Iris had forgotten how impressive her brother's height could be to a child. They walked over to the Inn's lobby and waited for the girl's mother to appear. The other guests looked at them and smiled over their newspapers. They appeared a ready-made family and Iris did not find the need to correct them. Finally, Mrs. Lennox appeared and after thanking Iris left with the girls in tow. Iris could now spend time with her brother and question him why he wasn't in school. But she did not want to do that with the rest of the Inn watching her. Justin waited as she ran and clocked out, grabbing her coat on the way out. They didn't speak until they were outside the Inn and walking on the sidewalk.

"Justin, I am very happy to see you. But why aren't you in school?'

He didn't say anything but merely smiled and opened the door to a local cafe they had happened upon. They sat down and a waiter came and took their orders. Justin finally spoke after the waiter had brought them their coffee. " Can't I come by and surprise my sister?"

"Well, yes, of course...but does your school know you are here?"

Justin smiled mischievously at her and Iris found herself returning the smile. "Actually, no. My school doesn't know am here. I'm playing hooky and thought you might need some excitement as well."

Iris laughed and agreed with Justin. They soon finished their coffee and were walking down the sidewalk once more. As they walked, Iris could see out of the corner of her eye other women stop and stare as Justin walked by. For an instant, jealousy ran through her, but it was soon replaced with calmness as she realized that Justin was not returning the women's stares. Instead, he continued to tell her about school and how much he missed being with her. Their walk back ended back at the Inn where Iris had left the car that morning. As the car pulled away from the Inn, it occurred to her that Justin had walked from the train station to the Inn. When she asked him about this he had jokingly replied: " Well, yeah, how else do you think I got there? By magic?" She giggled at his remark and he was soon laughing along with her. They pulled into the driveway and found Rose and Norman in the living room. They were surprised to see Justin, but soon saw how happy Iris had become, so they didn't ask too many questions.

To Norman's eye, Iris appeared more happy and full of life as she sat next to Justin on the sofa. Iris had never said anything to Justin about them, but Norman still wondered if Justin suspected anything. Over the course of a few months, Norman and Iris had met discretely and taken pleasure in each other's bodies. Rose had, to Norman's eye, not suspected what was going on. And because of this, she had unknowingly given them a few opportunities when she joined a Woman's Book Club that met twice a week. During that time, Norman and Iris had ended up back in the guest room. Their lovemaking was intense and heightened by the fact that Rose could return sooner than planned. But she never did. And now Justin was home unannounced on a night Rose was going to her Book Club. Norman found himself resenting Justin being home, but tried not to show it. Iris was overjoyed to have her brother home and that was all that mattered.  
Norman found himself alone with Justin in the living room as Rose and Iris began to make dinner. Talk soon turned to sports and Norman soon found himself lost in the conversation, forgetting what might have happened that night. As Iris and Rose prepared dinner, they talked about the latest book Rose was reading. Joining the Book Club had opened up a world of literature for Rose and Iris was happy for this.

As Iris began to set the table, she thought about how strange her life had become in the past few months. Here she was at twenty-seven years of age, and she was a Reverend's mistress. And not just any man's mistress, but Norman Balthus's. Her nights with Norman were filled with passion, but she also knew the nights were filled with lust. She did not kid herself in regards to this. She knew Norman liked nice things, like his new car or a new suit every now and then. She also knew that Norman was not in love with her. She was happy about this, because she was not in love with him. She could not be in love with him, because she loved somebody else. Not that she didn't love him as a person who had been kind to her. She did love him that way, but she wasn't in love with him. They cared about one another; there was no question about that. No, their affair was about passion and lust. It was just sex, and Iris planned on keeping it that way.

She had finished setting the table, and called Justin and Norman to the table. Iris found it ironic that Rose did not suspect what was going on under her own roof, but Rose had not always known what went on under her roof and Iris was not about to be telling her. It was more ironic to Iris that she could find herself talking with Rose and not feel remorseful about screwing her husband the minute Rose walked out the door. It was just the way thing were. She still cared for Rose and considered her to be a friend as well as her guardian, but she did not feel awful at her actions regarding Norman and his marriage. Justin was home tonight, and that was all that matter. All thoughts of Norman and Rose were pushed to the side as Iris sat at the table with her family and enjoyed their meal and Justin's presence.


	12. Dreams

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Eleven: Dreams

Iris dreamed that night about her life in Russia with her mother Plemina. To Irina, her mother had been the most beautiful and talented woman she had ever met. Her mother had been her whole world as a small child, and she thought she would never be happier. They went on picnics together and her mother had sung to her as she brushed her hair at night. Plemina Belyakov had married young, and sometimes people thought her and her daughter were sisters. Whenever this happened, Irina would giggle as she held her mother's hand and listen as Plemina explained the truth. Her father adored her mother, but he was rarely home. Even as a small child, of almost six, she knew her father was an important man. He was a soldier and would bring her home dolls from his many trips. But since he was rarely home that left Irina and her mother to do whatever they wanted. Of course her lessons had come first, but in the beginning there weren't that many lessons to learn.

One day Irina noticed that her mother's tummy had gotten bigger and when she asked her what was inside, her mother had just smiled. Irina could still feel the gentle touch of her mother's hand as she took her small hand and placed it on her tummy. They both stood there quiet as church mice as Irina had tried to figure out what was inside her mother. She looked up to Plemina's face and found her smiling down at her. The window behind her glowed around her head and Irina had thought her mother looked like an angel. Suddenly, she felt a movement beneath her hand and she jumped back. "Mama, your food is moving around in you." Plemina laughed and took her hand in hers. She led Irina over to their parlor room and sat down beside her on the sofa. She then explained to her that a baby was growing inside of her, and, one day soon, she would have a little brother or sister to play with.

Shocked, Irina had run from the room tears running down her face. Her small shoes had brought her to her room, and she threw herself down on her bed and really began to cry. She didn't want a little brother or sister. If there was a baby, her mother wouldn't have any time for her anymore. Babies, Irina had found, took up a mother's time and energy. There would be no more picnics or singing as her hair was being brushed. No, she would be forgotten when the new baby came. Pushed aside for someone smaller and cuter. Her mother would forget her, so happy with this new baby. She didn't want a new baby. Maybe they could send the baby away before her father came back home? Yes, that would work, and then she wouldn't have to worry about being replaced. Irina sat up on her bed, happy that she had found a solution to her problem.

She wiped the tears away from her face as her mother knocked on her door. The doorknob slowly turned and her mother entered the room. She said nothing, but merely walked over to Irina's bed and sat down and opened her arms up to her daughter. Irina had rushed into her arms and hugged her mother tightly, the whole time telling her of her plan to send the baby away. Her mother sighed and rubbed Irina's back. Plemina explained to her that the baby was not going to be sent away. Before Irina could off another protest, Plemina went on to tell her that she would not be replaced. That her mother and father loved her because she was their daughter, and no new baby would ever change that. Irina's bottom lip had begun to tremble again at her mother's words. Was she lying to her? Irina prayed her mother was not. She looked up again into her mother's face, and found only love and truth reflected back at her. She hugged her mother tighter and was overjoyed to find her mother's arms hugging her back with as much strength.

Now it was five months later, and her mother was in labor. Irina had been put to bed by her Nanny and had not seen her mother at all that day. Her father had been home the entire last three months and Irina didn't know what to think about to think about this. She loved her father, but she wasn't used to him being home for such a long period of time. Around midnight, her Nanny had woken her up and told her she had a baby brother. She was still sleepy as they walked down the hallway to her parent's room. Inside, she found her mother in bed, holding her brother in her arms. Plemina smiled at her and signaled for her to come closer. Irina slowly made her way to the bed and peered into the bundle her mother held. Her brother greeted her small eyes, and Irina was amazed at how small he was, like one of her dolls. Her mother then told her that his name was Alexei, and that he would grow up to adore her. Being a big sister was a big responsibility, but her mother reassured her that she could handle it. After all, she was a big girl of six years old. Irina smiled and sat down beside her mother. Her back was against the headboard as she continued to stare at her new little brother. Irina was surprised when her mother then asked her if she wanted to hold the baby. To her amazement, she wanted to. She held very still as her mother placed the small baby in her arms, reminding her to hold Alexei close to her body. She looked down at him, and found that he had woken up and was looking at her. A sweet peace stole over her as she smiled at Alexei. Irina could tell, without him saying anything that he liked her, and she felt an instant connection pass between them. So lost in her own thoughts, she didn't notice her father was in the room until he spoke. Irina looked up and found him looking directly at her. Had he too felt the connection between Irina and Alexei form? No, he didn't say anything to Irina, but, instead, spoke to her mother, letting her know that she had done her job in bearing him a son, and that he was pleased with her. Plemina said nothing to this and watched as her husband bent down and kissed his son's forehead and placed his hand gently on his daughter's head. He finally spoke to Irina as he told her that it was her job to look after her brother and to protect him always. Irina hadn't known what to say, so she nodded her head and watched as he left the room.

The years flew by, and her brother Alexei grew bigger every day. He was her constant shadow in everything she did, and Irina's love for him grew each day. Alexei, she had found, was better than her dolls. Suddenly her dream changed from its happy memory, and Iris found herself back in that dark cold river. The train had crashed. Water filled her lungs as she was tossed around like a rag doll by the water's current. She could not see Alexei as the water washed around her. She prayed that he was still holding her hand. Her father's face flashed before her condemning her for not keeping her word to always to protect her brother. Irina had tried to scream out that she hadn't broken her promise, but the river's current stopped her. She was suddenly on dry land and Alexei was beside her. That night was dark and forbidding, as she looked around to find that they were near a forest. The silence of the night echoed among the trees and Irina knew in her heart that her mother was dead. Alexei began to cry, and she gathered him in her arms. Telling him that they would be all right, and that they would survive. Irina did not know how they would be all right, but she didn't want to scare her brother any more than he already was. He looked up at her and spoke his first words since the accident.

"We will survive. Because we're in this together."

Irina hugged him closer to her, vowing that nothing would separate them. She wouldn't allow it. And neither would he.


	13. A Nightmare Becomes a Fantasy

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Twelve: A Nightmare Becomes a Fantasy

Iris sat up in her bed, the dream of that terrible night still racing through her head. She looked around the room as her heart beat against her chest. It was still nighttime, and the house was quiet. She drew her legs up underneath her as silent tears fall down her face. Her dream had been so real, and she could still feel her mother's arms around her hugging her. Why had she dreamed about her parents this night? Nothing in her day had reminded her of her parents or her life in Russia. She had been pleasantly surprised at Justin's arrival and taken joy in his presence that night at dinner. They had stayed up late just talking with one another as Rose had gone off to her Book Club. Norman had stayed and visited for a few moments, but he was soon in his office going over work. Iris did not miss him. She had finally said goodnight to Justin and gone to bed.

Her dream came back to her and she cringed at how real everything had been. She felt her mother's hugs and seen her wonderful smiles. Iris had not really thought about her mother since before her birthday. Why was that? As she wiped the tears away from her face, she pondered this question. Just like in her dream she remembered that her mother had married young. It wasn't until this moment that it dawned on her how young her mother had been. Plemina Belyakov was only 15 when she had gotten married and was soon pregnant with Irina. Iris thought to herself that her mother had been nothing but a baby when she had her. How frightening that must have been for her. But her mother had never shown any fear to the young child she had been. No, she had been filled with love and laughter and Iris had adored her. Just like in her dream, six years after her birth Alexei had been born. To Iris's calculations her mother had only been twenty-one years old. Younger than she was now. The river flashed across Iris's mind, and she saw as it fell into the water. Her tears came back as she realized that her mother had only been twenty-seven years old when she died. She hadn't even lived to reach her 30th birthday or to see her children grow up.

Is that what Iris was running from? Not a place or an event, but a person. She had been running from the ghost that was her mother at this age. That was why she didn't want a birthday party this year. That was why she was walking around with a dark cloud over her. She was the same age her mother had been when she died, and Iris realized that she couldn't acknowledge this. She didn't want to remember the last year of her mother's life or remember her as she died that night. She couldn't bear the thought of living longer than her mother had so she ran from her age. Iris laughed to herself. How could a person run from their age? It was something you just were. You couldn't run from it. But Iris had tried. God knew she had tried running and the ironic thing was that she had ended up in Norman's bed. In his arms she could truly forget who she was and become someone else. Someone who wasn't running from their past. Someone the total opposite of who her mother was at her age. Her mother had been faithful to her father while Iris had become a whore.

She knew that now. Knew that every one of her actions with Norman was in direct opposite of what her mother would have done. And in that way, she could continue running from the ghost of her mother. But, now, she knew what was bothering her. And she decided there and then to not keep running. Instead, she would embrace the truth and honor her mother's last year here on Earth. Not that it still didn't hurt her. It did. Her mother had been her whole world to her, and had bestowed great knowledge upon her. Iris wondered if Justin really remembered their mother. He had been so young when they lost her that night. Her beloved brother would be the only one who understood what she was going through. Iris pulled her covers back, and quietly walked over to her door. She opened the door and peered down the hallway. The only noise that greeted her was the hallway clock letting her know it was two in the morning. She quickly walked across the hallway to Justin's room. She placed her hand on the doorknob and rested the other one against his door. After taking a deep breath she opened the door.

Justin lay before her, wrapped up in his bed sheets. She closed the door behind her and walked over to his bedside. Would he be angry if she woke him up now? Iris didn't know but she took her chance anyways. She placed her hand on his forehead and gently called his name. His eyes opened and he looked surprised to see her standing there in her nightgown. She quickly explained that she had a nightmare about the river and their mother's death.

Justin looked at her with caring eyes and asked her if she wanted to stay with him. Iris nodded her head and Justin pulled back the covers and made room for her. She got into bed and thanked him. He smiled at her telling her it was the least he could do. She had always taken care of him and now he could return the favor. She told him a little about her dream and he listened patiently. Iris began to cry again but she didn't want her brother to see. So she turned her back on him till she was on the right side of her body. Justin's hands reached around her and he pulled her against him. He held her as she cried and kissed the top of her head.

Finally, her tears stopped and she stared at the wall across from her. Beneath the pillows their right hands were almost touching. She tried not to make a sound as his left hand that had been resting lightly against her stomach moved higher up. She bit her lip as his hand began to caress her breasts through her nightgown. His mouth was right beside her ear and she heard his intake of breath as her left hand trailed down his side and her fingers lightly began to move across his bottom. They said nothing to one another. They didn't need to. To speak now would be to ruin this game they had started to play the night before he left for school that first year. Iris gave a gasp as his hand moved from her breasts slowly down her stomach and began to pull her nightgown up. She moved her body to help him better and her nightgown was soon around her waist. He still said nothing but she could feel his breath now hot against her neck. His lips soon pressed against her neck as his hand made its way back down her stomach and found her panties. Iris's hand stopped caressing his behind as his hand slipped into her underwear.

Her right hand grabbed his and they laced their fingers together underneath the pillows. She arched her back as his fingers began to stroke her and she gave out a small cry as his fingers found her center. Her left hand grabbed his behind as the speed of his strokes intensified. Their legs became entangled as their breath came faster between them. Iris's left hand left his bottom and she soon had her fingers in his hair. She was so close and she could feel his arousal pressed up against her. His fingers continued to pleasure her as he moaned against her ear. Iris whimpered at what he was doing to her became too much for her to bear. Just when she thought she couldn't handle any more his fingers brought her to climax and she came calling out his name. Their breathing was the only sound in the room. Iris lay on her back, his hand had left her but he was now making little circles on her exposed stomach. Her face was flustered and she became redder as she watched as he lowered his head to her stomach. His tongue was soon tracing the circles he had made with his left hand. He lifted his head and Iris could smell her scent on his lips.

She brought her hands to his nightshirt and slowly began to unbutton it. Justin watched her do this with a small smile on his mouth as his hands roamed under her nightgown and found her breasts again. Iris moaned as his hands groped her and she almost didn't get his shirt off him. His hands then moved to her nightgown and he quickly pulled her gown over her head and away from her. He told her to close her eyes as he slowly pulled her underwear off her. She bit her lip again as she felt him move above her getting rid of the last of his pants and underwear. Her eyes were still closed as he leaned into her barely making contact. She let out another whimper as his mouth found her neck again. His lips played against her skin, but he made no move to enter her. Iris could hardly stand it any longer and opened her eyes. His head was beneath her his mouth still playing at her neck. Her hands gently took his head away from her neck and she forced him to look at her. His eyes were ablaze with lust and Iris brought her mouth to his ear. She whispered two words.

"Ask me."

Her eyes found his again and she waited for his response. He brought his mouth to her ear, and whispered his request. She nodded her head yes and then gasped as he entered her suddenly. He began to move inside her and she held him close to her. Her legs wrapped around his waist as he grinded into her repeatedly. They did not think about Rose or Norman who were in their bedroom across the house and one story away. No their bedroom was on the opposite side of Justin's room and they would not hear them. Not hear their moans and groans become louder with each passing moment and movement between them. They wouldn't see as their mouths hungrily sought one another. Not see as Iris threw her head back and cried out in pleasure as his mouth found her breasts again. And his tongue danced across her skin until his mouth was once more sucking and biting her breasts. Would not hear as Justin came within her calling out her true name. Would not hear her response as her body climaxed and she moaned out his name. The only name that had and would ever be on her lips.

"Alexei."


	14. Reality

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Thirteen: Reality

Iris awoke the next day to find herself in Justin's arms. She had fallen asleep with her head resting on his chest and he had wrapped his arms around her nude body. She heard the birds outside start to sing their morning songs and looked over to the clock on the nightstand. It was almost seven in the morning and Norman and Rose would be getting up soon. Justin was still asleep and Iris did not want to wake him. That wasn't how the game was played. She gentle removed his arms from her body and got out of bed. She found her nightgown and underwear and quickly threw them on. She then quietly open the bedroom door and peered out into the hallway. No one was up yet and she made her way to the bathroom at the end of the hallway. In the quiet of the bathroom she ran a bath and grabbed two towels from one of the cabinets. As the water filled the tub she removed her nightgown and looked into the full-length mirror at her reflection. Her hair hung down her back damp from their love making the night before. She traced the marks he had left on her body. The marks were spread across her breasts and her neck. They signaled his claim on her. Norman had never left marks like these on her. She hadn't allowed him to. It wasn't his play to lay claim to her body in such an intimate manner. Iris turned from the mirror and turned the water off. She quickly did away with her underwear and climbed into the tub. The water was hot and had already the steam from the tub had filled the room. She welcomed the heat to her sore body and began to wash herself. Her body was bruised and ached all over but she was happy. She quickly washed her hair and got out of the tub. As she wrapped the towel around her body she heard Justin open his door. She knew that he was disposing of the bed sheets and would put clean fresh ones back on as not to arise suspicion of what had taken place. She heard him close his door a moment later as she wrapped her hair up in the other towel. Clean and refreshed she went back to her room and got ready for the day to begin. Her nightgown and underwear lay in the bottom of the bathroom hamper. And Iris knew that Rose would not be going through their laundry. Iris would later clean her nightclothes. When a night like this happened Justin would take his soiled clothes back with him to school and clean them there. Nights like last night rarely happened between them. They did not go to each other's rooms unless on of them had a bad dream. He had not come to her room and been in her bed since the beginning of that year. Her going to him was only the second time that they had made love that year. Iris left her room and headed into the kitchen. As she walked down the hallway she heard the shower running and knew Justin was now in their bathroom. She began to prepare breakfast and turned the radio on to fill the silence. She was standing in front of the stove when she heard Justin come into the room. She did not turn around but instead listened as he walked over to the refrigerator and got something out of it. She assumed it was either milk or orange juice. He closed the refrigerator door and on his way back to the table he passed by her. His lips found her check in a chaste kiss and he then sat down. They said nothing to one another about last night. No words were spoken of how they had clung to one another delirious happy to be together again. Once again made whole. The words were never spoken the next day or any day that followed. To speak these words out loud would shatter the fantasy they had made. The fantasy was never spoken of or acknowledge in any form and manner. To speak the words would be to bring their true selves into the bright harsh light of reality. And at this time it was not possible. It wasn't an option for them. So their time together was unspoken. Iris liken the situation to saying their true names to another person or hearing another person use their true names as if it belonged sole to them. They would never allow anyone to do such a thing. Their names were sacred only to each other. Their true names in a way strengthened and intensified the bond they had created and no one was going to break that bond.

The song changed as Norman and Rose came into the kitchen. They said good morning to their children and sat down at the table. Iris finished preparing the meal and she sat down next to Justin. They said grace and everyone soon began to eat. It had been decided that Norman would take Justin to the train station so he could return to school. Rose was planning to go shopping for a baby shower. Iris let her know that she had time before going to work if Rose wanted company. Rose accepted her offer and soon the dishes were being put away. Norman and Justin said goodbye and Rose hugged Justin and told him to do well in school. Then it was Iris's turn to say goodbye to her brother. They were still the kitchen and Norman was waiting in the doorway. She hugged her brother and whispered a goodbye in his ear and then he was gone. The rest of her day went by in a blur and Iris soon found herself at home again. Rose was upstairs so she took the opportunity to talk with Norman. She found him in the parlor room reading a newspaper. He looked up as she entered the room and walked over to him. She stood in front of him calmly and in a soft voice informed him that their affair was over starting from that moment on. His eyes had widened at her words and he found that he couldn't find the words to reply. Instead he nodded his head and watched as she turned and left the room. There had been no sorrow or remorse in her voice as she spoke to him. Her words had been clean and to the point. And just like that their affair was over as abruptly as it had began. Norman didn't know what to think or feel about this. His one constant thought was how ironic it was that she had told him their nights were over in the very same room that their affair had began in. He went back to reading his paper and soon Rose joined him and began reading her latest novel. Iris, he had found out, had gone to bed earlier. The days that followed appeared like a dream to Norman. He hadn't realized how much he had come to look forward to his nights with Iris. Even though he knew he knew his actions with her were wrong. She had been his blessing and his curse. Now she was gone. He sometimes wondered if he had dreamed the whole affair but the memory of her face and the touch of her body against his always came back to hauntingly remind him that it had been real. The rest of that year went by and Norman filled his days with the Church and reconnecting with his wife. His relationship with Iris went back to that of a friend and guardian. Neither of them spoke of those passion filled nights. And gradually over time those nights became a distant memory that Iris made herself forget. Forget that she had been her guardian's lover and how she had ran from the past. Instead she choose to remember that period in her life as a dark cloud whose only silver lining had been remembering her mother and their life before the train accident. Justin had continued with his schooling that year and his involvement in the Church. They did not speak of that night of heated forbidden passion as they lay in each other's arms. Instead they spoke in private of their mother Plemina. Iris shared the memories she had of their mother before he was born but they did not speak of the river. The river was something that Iris did not want Justin to remember yet. The time wasn't right and he was not ready to learn and accept what had happened that night. He still needed to be protected and she was not about to break the promise she had made the day he was born. Besides he was her world and she was his. They both knew this. Norman and Rose continued to care for them until the day came that Justin was giving his own Church in a town called Mintern. The Balthus were proud of Justin but Iris was the proudest of them all. All of her hard work at the Inn was beginning to pay off and soon they would have a home of their very own. His destiny lay in the not so distant future and Iris knew that she would do anything and everything to see him fulfill that destiny. She alone knew what and who he was. She alone understood what was waiting for him. And she would be by his side when that time came. They were in this together and nothing would change that. Her Alexei would rise and meet his destiny, as he was intended too. She promised herself this. After all she wasn't just some person to be pushed aside. She was Iris on the outside but on the inside she knew who she was. Who she had always been and always would be. Irina Belyokav. The lion not the flea. The protector of Alexei Belyakov and older sister of Justin Crowe. He was the other half that made her whole. She belonged to him and him alone. He only had to ask her and she would appear. The lion. The protector. The friend. The sister. The lover. The confident. The companion. The one who made him whole. His Irina.


	15. The Lioness

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Fourteen: The Lioness

Her memories ended and Iris was once again in her room. Alone. Exhausted by the trip down memory lane she let her body fall back from its sitting position and curled up on her bed. Her hand played unconsciously with a thread from her bedspread. Even after almost twenty years she could still feel his hands on her body from that night. He had loved her than with an unwavering adoring passion. She had been his and his alone. No other woman had been in his bed and felt the touch of his lips against theirs. It had just been the two of them for the longest time. Except for the affair with Norman she had been faithful to Justin. Even Tommy Dolan hadn't gotten as far as Norman had. Tommy had been kind to her before he knew the truth about the fire. She knew that he only wanted to be close to her so he could become closer to Justin and his story. He had been honest with her about his intentions towards her brother and she could not say that he had lied to her. No Tommy had been honest about wanting more listeners and more money for his career. She had allowed him to pay her attention so that she could further Justin's destiny. Not that his attention hadn't been flattering. She was flattered but she knew that it could not go anywhere. A small part of her had wanted to kiss him back and forget for a moment who she was. But she didn't allow herself this indulgence to take place. Instead she had told him that he should have been ashamed of himself for kissing her. She wasn't stupid. She knew that Tommy probably thought a little kiss here and there would be all right since they had spent so much time together. But it wasn't all right. He had no claim to her as a woman and kissing her had been crossing the line. Justin would surely have not approved and so she had quickly gotten out of Tommy's car and stormed into the house.

She didn't know what she would have done if Justin had never come back home. She knew how to work and could support herself if she had too. But she also knew that Justin would be coming home because he would have questions only she could answer. So she had waited for his returning with each passing day. Except for his time away in school they had never really been separated. Not until his wanderings in the wilderness. Where he refound who he was. Not until he learned of his birthright and how she had kept it from him. She had done this to protect him until the time was right. Their time apart had almost been her undoing. During the day she was in control and showed no fear to those around her. Or to those who had whispered that Justin might not be coming back. They didn't know anything. She knew in her heart that he would be back. But while he was gone her nights had become the longest part of her day. She had come to dread the nights alone in their home. He wasn't there to listen to the radio with her at night. A tradition they had started after moving into their new home that first year in Mintern. He wasn't there to talk to or to listen to as he practiced one of his sermons. Their home had lain still and silent at night. His empty presence had echoed in every corner of every room. She had found herself unable to bare his absence. To be closer to him she had ended up staying in his room. She slept in his bed and found comfort in the scent he had left behind. She felt closer to him this way and the nights had begun to feel not so long. He had stayed away from her lost in his own thoughts and revelations. She longed for his safe return but knew that he would be upset with her when he did return. She had not heard him enter their house or his room until she felt his hand on her mouth. Frightened she had awaken fearing for her life. Her eyes had finally settled on him leaning over her and she could not tell what he was thinking. He appeared a change man and Iris didn't know what he would do with her now. She watched as he tenderly stroked her face and then blushed when he kissed her. His kiss had been chaste and at the same time promised for something more. Still uncertain of his motives she had laid still as he sat back up and watched her. He could have taken her then and there if he wanted too. But that wasn't the game he was playing that night. Instead he had acted like a child and questioned her past decisions. She had put a stop to that and then he had listened as she told him what she knew of his destiny. In the morning Tommy Dolan had reappeared. She had played her cards well and Justin had gone off in a huff to the other room. In the end he finally appeared on Tommy's radio show and their lives had never been the same since.

The past few months washed over her and she closed her eyes. They had once been so close and now he was forever pushing her away. Why? She didn't understand why he was doing this to her. To them. After his spell in the Temple of Jericho she had told him she wouldn't be sacrificed and she meant it. He knew it too but he had still stung her along in thinking she would go to jail for the fire. He had meant to hurt her for her past actions and she suspected for keeping him in the dark all those years. Could he not see that she had done it to protect him? She had sacrificed everything for him to be where he was now. And yet he was treating her like some flea on a dog that needed to be washed away. He had said she was forgiven for the fire. He had even called her Irina and sealed her forgiveness with a chaste kiss on her check. And he had done and said all of this in front of Tommy Dolan too. And yet his actions since her confession spoke otherwise. She had been pushed aside and others had taken her place as his confident. That had hurt her most of all. He knew that would and yet he continued to exclude her from his life. Instead of confiding in her he had put her through penance and made her think that would be taken from his side. When that didn't happen she thought he would finally come back to her. She had been wrong again. He had purposely led her around in circles. In the end she had kneeled on broken class for him and it had been for nothing. Their mother would never have allowed him to do this to her and she let him know it. His reply had been cold and mean spirited. "Mother is dead." She hadn't let him see the tears that had formed in her eyes. He knew how special their mother was to her and he had purposely hurt her with his reply. He had also taken back any control she thought she had gained. Iris opened her eyes and looked up at the ceiling above her.

He had found other ways to hurt her too. She had not been privy to his conversations with Varlyn Stroud or with Wilfred Smith. She hadn't even met Varyln Stroud and she already didn't like him. Justin had spared her from a life in prison for her crime. But at the same time he had made their new home her jail. He had also taunted her with the maids coming in and out of their house. She knew what he was doing with these girls and yet she continued to hire them. She had seen what he had done with Celeste and had even had to clean up after him when he was done with the girl. The poor girl had gone mad from her nights with Justin. A part of her had felt sorry for Celeste. The girl was just a piece on the chess board and not even a very important piece at that. Iris had comforted the girl and taken care of matters. Like she always did when it came to Justin. He had acted like nothing was wrong and so she had said nothing to him. He continued to taunt her with the young pretty girls. The maids had been a slap in her face. She knew she wasn't the young pretty woman who had nightmares and who would come to his bedroom. She hadn't been that young woman in a long time and seeing these girls was a constant reminder of that. Before he had gained such a huge following and they had moved to this farmhouse he had been happy with who she had become. Before the visions and the Ministry he had adored her. It had just been them and they had grown older together and were happy. Even after his radio broadcast and learning the truth about the fire he had still wanted her. Her age had not been a problem and he had not looked at another woman yet. He had wanted her then and she let him take her whenever he pleased. But then he began to distance himself from her and he shut her out when talking with Tommy Dolan. She had been pushed aside and now one young girl after another was in his bed. Not her. Iris closed her eyes again. Everything he had done to her was out of spite. She knew this and as she thought about everything that had happened between them she became anger. How dare he treat her like this. She wasn't one of his followers to be told what to do or to be tossed aside when he was done with them. She was his sister and without her he wouldn't have survived to live to see this day. She sat up and thought some more. Did he think he was the only one who had ever touched her?

Tommy Dolan really hadn't counted even though Justin had offered her to him. That had hurt too. But if Justin wanted her with Tommy than she would have gone. Not permanently but she still would have with Tommy if Justin wished it. Tommy had declined and she had been embarrassed yet again. She knew that Justin thought something had gone on between her and Tommy when he was gone. How she wished at this moment that she had gone to bed with Tommy. Just so she could throw this fact in his face. She was so upset with him now that if he wasn't careful she was going to slap him one day soon. She didn't care if it was in front of the migrants or the newspaper reporters. She feared that if she started slapping him she wouldn't be able to stop and all her past hurt would come out in a rage. No she couldn't embarrass him like that in public. Their fighting was a private matter. And if it were ever to come to blows Iris wanted it to be only between herself and Justin. Privacy was something they valued highly. She knew that a public fighting would bring disgrace to his mission. If she wanted to talk with him then she had to do it in the privacy of their home. And sometimes she couldn't even do that. Anger filled her once more and she glanced over at the clock on her nightstand. The time read nearly ten at night but she knew Justin would still be awake. She got up from her bed and grabbed her robe out of the closet. Even if he didn't want to talk to her she wanted to talk to him. She would not take no for an answer or be pushed aside yet again. She closed her bedroom door and made her way towards Justin's room. She was furious with how he had treated her over the past months and she wasn't going to stand for it any longer. She wanted to hurt. As he had hurt her with keeping her in the dark and with the maids taunting who she used to be. He was finally going to get a taste of his own medicine and she was going to tell him the truth. The truth that he wasn't the only man to have taken her to bed and given her pleasure. She wanted to see his face as he heard this news. She wanted to hurt him as painfully as he had hurt her and this was her only option left. She knew she was being childish but she didn't care. She wasn't going to be pushed aside and left behind. She wasn't some flea to be swatted away. She was the lion and the sooner he realized that the better. Her walk ended and she found herself outside Justin's door. She knocked on his door and he opened it. He was already dressed in his nightclothes and she could see that he had already turned down his bed. He looked down at her with a questionable look on his face. That tethered between curiosity and annoyance. She looked him straight in the eye and said one thing.

"We need to talk."

He raised an eyebrow and seemed to be thinking of a way to get rid of her. She wouldn't let him do that and she pushed him aside and walked into his room. He closed the door behind him and then there was only silence that filled the hallway.


	16. Whispers

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Fifteen: Whispers

"Whispers" by Afanasy Foeth 1850

Whispers. Timid breathing. Trilling

Of a nightingale.

And below the runnel-rocking,

Sleepy, silver-pale.

Strange nocturnal lights and shadow,

Shadows that enlace.

Row on row of magic changes

On the dearest face.

Smoky cloudlets, rose and purple,

With a tinge of fawn.

Kisses. Ah, and tears among them.

And the dawn, the dawn.

Iris stood with her back to him. She looked around his room and thought of the young girls one after another coming through this room. Her hands clenched at her side and she tried not to scream out the betrayal she felt. She could feel his eyes bore into her back as he waited for her to speak. She closed her eyes and gathered her strength together. She wanted him to feel the hurt and pain she had endured this past year. To feel the sting of rejection from a loved one who had been scorned. He had to understand that he couldn't hurt her anymore. That she wouldn't allow him to. She prayed that he would realize this and stop tormenting her. Couldn't he see that if he wasn't careful he was going to lose her? His smug attitude repeatedly told her that he didn't see this. Didn't see that he was slowly killing her by rejecting her. She wouldn't stand for this anymore. He had to learn that he couldn't do this to her. She unclenched her hands and turned around. Justin was standing by the end of the bed staring at her. He couldn't read what was written across her face and he felt like he had stepped into the eye of a storm. The woman before him was his sister and at the same time she didn't look like her. Justin's eyes traveled down her body and he found that her robe wasn't tied around her waist and that her feet were bare. Her legs stood out against the dark color of her robe. His eyes continued to stare at her legs beneath her slip. Standing there he remember that night in their old home when he had awoken from another dream. He had rub his eyes and glanced over at the couch. Iris was lying there. Her robe was pulled up around her waist and his gaze had travel over her body and landed on her thighs. His sister's thighs fascinated him. Her whole body fascinated him but her thighs held a special place in his memories. He had been a teenager riding in the car with her when his gaze had first fallen on her thighs. She was driving Norman's car and for the life of him he couldn't remember where they going. He did remember how she looked as she drove the car to their destination. She was dressed modestly in a light blue cotton dress. She wore stockings underneath the dress but in the course of their drive she had pulled her dress up a little higher to let her legs feel the cool air outside. Her dress had then covered her knees modestly. He really couldn't see anything but the bottom part of her right leg and her shoe pressed up against the gas pedal. Her hair was pulled up in the latest fashion of that year and she had just barely turn twenty years old. The weather outside had been unusual hotter than anyone could remember. Justin had been sitting in the passenger seat listening as Iris went on about her new job at the Inn. His gaze had drifted to the scenery outside and he had not heard the last thing she said. When she had repeated her question to him twice he had finally heard the words. His gaze left the window and he looked at her. He could only see her profile as she asked him again if he wanted to stop for lunch. They had been driving for an hour and it was close to lunchtime. He wasn't hungry but he could tell that she was so he had replied yes to her question. She nodded her head and her eyes continue to focus on the road before her. He had stared at her as she drove and his eyes were soon traveling from her face down her neck and stop at her breasts. Earlier that year he had accidentally seen her as she got out of the bathtub. They were getting read for a friend's wedding at their church. Norman and Rose were upstairs getting ready in their bathroom and he had been wandering around the house waiting for everyone to finish dressing. He had been dressed and ready before anyone else and was now restless. His wandering led him down the hallway back to his room. The bathroom door had been opened a little and he knew that Iris was getting ready for the wedding. She was humming a song to herself again and he had without thinking leaned closer to the crack in the door. His eyes had found her drying her body off with a towel and he became mesmerized as he watched her. She didn't see him there and he knew that it was wrong to be looking at her like this. His eyes had danced across her skin and landed on her breasts. He had never seen a woman's breasts before and he watched as hers rose and fell with each breath she took. She looked at the door suddenly as if sensing someone was there and he had raced back to his room and prayed that she hadn't heard him. Now he was once again staring at her breasts praying that she wouldn't notice his gaze. He quickly looked back at her face and to his relief she was still staring straight ahead. He knew that he shouldn't be staring at her body but she fascinated him. She had gone from a young girl who used to play outdoors with him to a young woman men stared at as they walk by. His gaze went back to her breasts and then down her stomach and finally rest on her thighs. The shape of her thighs played against her dress and he found himself unable to look away. His eager eyes saw that her thighs had open a little as her right leg stretch out pushing the gas pedal down. His eyes gaze at the space between her legs and then at her pelvis. Images of her nude body flashed in his mind and he suddenly wanted to reach out and touch her. It had taken every once of his will power not to give in to this impulse. Instead he had willed his eyes to look away and went back to gazing out the window.

Justin's memory ended and he was once again staring her thighs beneath her slip. His eyes travel back up her body and stop on her breasts. He had taken his time looking at her expose legs and now he took his time staring at her breasts. Her breasts had become fuller and each nipple danced out against her slip. His gazing at her body had aroused not only him but her as well. His eyes left her breasts and finally came back to her face. She was blushing and her mouth was open a little as if she wanted to say something. The only sound in the room was their breathing. They stare at one another across the small distance between them. She had come to his room. The next move was his. She watched as he close the distance between them and then he was standing right in front of her. She looked into his eyes and saw something that she never thought she would see again. He wanted her. His gazing upon her had aroused them both and now they both wanted satisfaction. She closed her eyes as she remembered why she ha come here in the first place. She wasn't going to back down now. Even though a part of her just want him to take her right there. She sighed and opened her eyes. He was still looking at her with lust in his eyes. She placed her hands on his chest and allowed him to bring his mouth down onto her neck. Her hands moved from his chest as his arms encircled her waist beneath her robe. She held onto him as his mouth played against her nice kissing and biting her. She let out a gasp as his hands grab her bottom. His mouth moved form one side of her neck to the other side. They continue to hold onto one another as if one of them was drowning. She brought her mouth to his ear and whispered in Russian that he wasn't the only man to have touched her like this. His mouth continued to bite and kiss her neck as if he hadn't heard her. She knew that he had and that he was ignoring her to make her words not true. His hands continued to roam over her body and found her breasts. His ear was still near her mouth and she knew what she had to do. She whispered the year their affair had taken place and where he had been. She whispered about the birthday party that year and how she had missed their mother. He knew she wasn't making anything up. He had been there and been a witness to her pain that year. His hands stop fondling her breasts and he raised his head from her neck. They were still holding one another and he looked at her as if she was lying. She gave him a small sad smile. Happy to be back in control. Now he would know how she felt to be tossed aside for someone else. He would be anger and hurt but she didn't care. She took her hands from his arms and gently brought his head to her mouth. His breath was hot against her neck as he waited for her to say the man's name. Waited to hear who this man was that had taken her to bed numerous times. Waited to hear who had made her cry out in pleasure and who had dared touch her. Waited to her that another man's name had been on her lips as she came in his arms. He closed his eyes as her mouth moved against his ear and whispered one name: Norman Balthus. Shocked he open his eyes praying to God that he had heard wrong. He looked down at her and found that wasn't lying. She was telling the truth and he stood there as she told him how their affair had started. How they always used the guest bedroom to make love in and how Norman had even taken her in his office. The same office that Justin had sat in with his mentor and talk with. The same office that they had played in as children. His arms around her fell and he slowly started to back away from her shaking his head no. This couldn't be true. He would have known if something like this was going on. They told each other everything but she hadn't told him about this. He stood there and felt like someone had stuck a hundred knives into him.

She stood across from him and told him everything about their affair. How long their affair had lasted and how Norman would call out her name when he came inside her. How his kisses felt on her mouth and how his hands had roamed across her body almost every night. His eyes burned with anger and pain as she went on calmly about how Rose had done them a favor by joining that book club. Told him how the minute Rose step out the door that Norman and her were instantly tearing each others clothes off and how he never suspected any of it. Justin closed his eyes as the images played across his mind. She wasn't lying. She had willing gone to bed numerous times with their guardian and he had never suspected a thing. His whole body by now had tighten with anger and revulsion for what she had done. She had betrayed him. She had let another man touch her and taken her to bed. Another man had felt her legs wrap around them and heard her sighs and moans. Another man had been in her body and made her cry out his name. The images kept coming and Justin willed them to stop but they didn't. Another man had dared touched his Irina and that man had been his mentor and guardian. Justin wanted to kill Norman right then and there. Wanted to end the old man's life once and for all. Iris was calling his name again and he opened his eyes. He watched as she walk over to him and spoke to him again.

"Now you the truth Alexei. Now you know how it feels to be tossed aside by the person who loves you. Who would do anything for you. I won't be toss aside for one pretty maid after another. Do you hear me. I won't be pushed out of your life for someone else. Someone who hasn't been by your side since the day you were born. You are not sacrificing me for your mission. I am sick of your games and am not playing them anymore. Do you understand me Alexei!."

She shouted the last part out at him and he saw that she was shaking with rage. His eyes narrowed as he watched her standing there waiting for his response. One thought kept running through his mind. "His Irina had been with another man." The fact that it was Norman was twice a blow to him but the real blow was that she had allowed this to happen. That she had allowed another man to kiss her. To hold her and give her pleasure. That another man had felt her hands on them and tasted her mouth. Justin began to shake his head again and Iris began to yell at him in Russian. Yell at him that she wouldn't be left behind. Yelled at him that he couldn't do this to her. Justin tuned her out as that one thought played over and over in his head. "His Irina had been with another man. She had betrayed him." Rage filled him from the bottom of his feet to his head and without thinking his arm rose and he slap her hard across her face. The blow sent her reeling and she landed on his bed. Shocked she sat up with tears and fury in her eyes. He had never struck her before. How dare he! Iris stood up and cursed his name in Russian. Cursed the day that he was born and cursed him for being her brother. Justin stood there shock written across his face. He had never hit her before and no matter what she had done he had no right to strike her. His anger left him as she continued to curse him. She threw every curse their mother had taught them at him. When she was done her face was red and she was breathing hard. He had stood there and taken every curse she had given him. He tried to say something but no words would appear. She wiped her hand across her eyes and began to walk past him and out his door. His hand shot out and he grabbed her wrist. She struggled and tried to get his fingers off her wrist. As she began to yell at him again his body sunk down onto the floor and he wrap his arms around her waist. Iris was taken back by his sudden movement and stop struggling. His head was against her stomach and he was mouthing words into her slip that she couldn't hear. She closed her eyes as his arms wrap around tighter and his body shook with emotion. She opened her eyes and look down at him. He was still mouthing the same words and she saw to her amazement that he was crying. She let her hands caress his hair and began to hum a song she use to sing when he was a little boy. They stayed like that for a long time. She had finally hurt him and gotten her pound of flesh. His tears stop and he looked up at her. Iris continued to play with his hair as he finally spoke the words he couldn't before.

"Please forgive me Irina. Forgive me."

He was sincere in his request and Iris found herself wanting to forgive him. Found herself wanting to put the past behind them and begin anew. She didn't know it that was possible. He was sorry terribly sorry for hitting her but she didn't know if he would stop tormenting her. If he would stop shutting her out and let her back in. She could tell from the expression on his face that he didn't know either. They had said so much and done so much to hurt one another that neither knew if they could walk away from it. She wanted to be able to forget what they had done to one another. To forget the games they had played and return to who they use to be. But part of her knew that wouldn't happen and she close her eyes again. He continued to watch her waiting for her answer. He had read each of her though as they played across her face as if she had spoken them out loud. She open her eyes and look back down at him.

"I will forgive you if you promise never to raise your hand against me."

He nodded his head and would have agreed to anything she said at the moment. She smiled and he buried his head into her stomach again like the little boy he use to be. The house was quiet as they stood there in the middle of his room. Iris continued to let her fingers roam through his hair. His mouth was against her stomach and every breath he took warm her. His arms that had been wrap around her waist slowly began to loose their tight grip on her. She let out a small cry as his hands began to caress her behind. She closed her eyes and let him pull her slip up over her hips. His mouth found her bare skin and began to leave kisses across her stomach. She held him close to her body and open her eyes. His head danced beneath her kissing and bitting at her skin. His hands roamed over her behind and soon found her legs. She let out a gasp as his hands begin to caress her legs and thighs. Her robe became too hot to bear and she took the robe off and left it on the floor. She was now only standing in her slip and underwear as Justin continue to caress her skin. Her hands found his hair again and she tried to bring him up to her. Their breathing had become heavy and the need to be satisfied grew. He stopped his kisses and looked up at her. She smiled down at him and he smiled back at her. He stood up and pulled her towards him. His mouth was soon upon hers and she closed her eyes and wrapped her arms around him. His mouth was bittersweet against hers and she returned his kisses with as much passion as he was kissing her. A moan escaped her as his tongue forced its way into her mouth. His hands continue to roam over her body and they clung to one another. His mouth left hers and she opened her eyes. He was staring at her with lust and adoration in his eyes and she wanted to cry. Instead she brought her mouth to his neck. He moaned against her ear and his hands wrap under her bottom. He lifted her up and she wrap her legs around his waist continuing to bite at his neck. He carried her over to his bed and gently laid her down. He hovered over her and she moved until her head was resting on one of his pillows. He climbed onto the bed and she spread her legs for him. They were soon kissing one another with an abandon passion as their bodies pressed against one another. Their hands roamed over each other's bodies and he soon had her slip off. She arched her back and moan as his tongue danced across her skin and found her breasts once more. Her legs wrap around his waist as he grinded into her. She met each of his movements and he moaned his approval. He soon brought his mouth back to hers and her hands found his nightshirt. She began to unbutton his shirt but he stopped kissing her. She looked at him with a questionable look on her face. He gave her a strange smile and then leaned over her and turned the nightstand lamp off. The room was in total darkness and Iris was surprised by his action. Her surprise didn't last long as she felt his hands on her hips. He slowly pulled her panties off in the darkness. He soon had his nightclothes off and he grabbed her legs bringing her closer to him. They each let out a cry as their bodies became one. He moved inside her and she met each of his movements as only an old lover could. The room echoed with their lovemaking and neither of them cared if anyone else in the house heard them. They were beyond caring if anyone saw them. They clung to another and his bed shook with every one of their movements. The room was filled with their gasps and moans as they rediscover each other in the darkness. Justin's voice filled the room as he came inside her calling out her true name. The room echoed with her response as she came in his arms calling out the one name that had always been on her lips. Alexei.


	17. Lost in Your Lies

The Fine Print: Daniel Knauf and HBO own _Carnivale_ and, unfortunately, Justin and Iris.

**Minutes Like Hours**

By twinb80

Chapter Sixteen: Lost in Your Lies

Tournique - Evanescence

Look here she comes now

Bow down and stare in wonder

Oh how we love you

No flaws when your pretending

But now I know she...

Never was and never will be

You don'tknow how you betrayed me

And somehow you've got everybody fooled

Without the mask where will you hide?

Can't find yourself lost in your lies

I know the truth now

And I don't love you anymore

The cool night air blew into Norman's room. He found the breeze helped him sleep better at night. His mind had been going i circles all day since his encounter with Iris earlier that day. The past had played like a movie in his mind and he found himself remembering with clarity the way her body had felt against his. He could still see her face as it appeared that first night they made love. Her legs had tightened around him as she came and she cried out a man's name. So lost in his own pleasure as he came inside her the man's name had never registered in his mind. His face now burned with shame as he remembered their affair. Those months had been like a dream to him that he never wanted to wake from. Norman cursed his younger self for being so selfish and careless. The man he used to be had repeatedly taken pleasure in her youthful body and had not thought of the consequences of his actions. He had not lied to Iris when he told her that she wouldn't get pregnant. The slight possibility of him being wrong had been pushed to the back of his mind and forgotten. If she had actually gotten pregnant Norman did not know what he would have done. In his heart he knew the right thing to do would be to ask for forgiveness from God and Rose. To publicly raise the child as his own no matter the gossip that was sure to follow them. His heart knew this but his mind had never truly grasped the reality of the situation. Since she had never gotten pregnant he foolishly had felt invincible as to their actions. That had all change the night she told him their affair was over. Norman had been shocked at the sudden reversal of heart that she had but had said nothing. In the coming days and weeks she had acted like their affair had never taken place and Norman had learned how to play along. The rest of that year he reconnected with his wife and buried himself in Church related work. The years had passed and he had pushed the memory of their time together back in his mind and forced himself to forget the taste of her mouth on his. He and Rose had watched with pride as Justin took over the duties at First Methodist in Mintern and their lives were happy. Norman let the cool breeze outside his window lull him to sleep and he was soon dreaming of the past. Outside his room he could hear the voices of the people below in the living room. Earlier that day they had buried his beloved Rose in the First Methodist Cemetery and now they were back in their home for her wake. Justin and Iris had driven home immediately upon hearing of Rose's passing. Norman did not know what he would have done if they had not come home. His mind had been in a fog since Rose's passing. Thankfully Justin and Iris had taken over the funeral preparations and Norman had been left to grieve in peace.

Upon returning home he had gone to their room and not been downstairs since then. He could still sense her presence in their room and he closed his eyes and let his tears fall. Some time later he heard a knock on the door and went open the door. Iris stood before him dressed in a black dress and a plate of food in her hands. He let her into the room and sat back down on the bed. Iris closed the door behind her. She walked over to the small table in the room and put the plate down. When she turned around she found him staring at her as if he didn't know she was. She stood there and watched as his eyes took in her presence and she began to feel uncomfortable as his gaze travel over her body. She crossed her arms and walked over to him. He looked up at her face and she saw that he had some sort of paper clutch in his hand. She took the paper to be Rose's will since she had seen their attorney go up to Norman's room earlier. Norman continued to stare at her and say nothing. Iris closed her eyes and said a silent pray. She knew that Norman was struggling right now with the loss of Rose. But if he didn't say anything to her she didn't know how she could help him. She opened her eyes again and found him still staring at her with a dazed look on his face. She let him know that she would be downstairs if he needed anything else. All he had to do was call her name or Justin's and they would be there for him. He nodded his head to let her know that he had understood her words. She had made it across the room and her hand was on the doorknob when she heard him speak.

"Rose...I mean...Iris" He could barely get the words out of his mouth and he watched as she turn around. She stood there with one hand on the doorknob and the other hand laying at her side. Norman held the paper in his hand tighter and looked down. Concerned Iris walk back and stood in front of him. She waited till he could finally speak again. His eyes blurred again and then came to focus on her legs before him. The memory of those legs wrap tightly around him flooded his mind and he had to stop himself from reaching out and touching her. She was calling his name again. He found himself trying to focus on her voice instead of the memories going through his mind. Her voice cut through his muddle mind and he look up at her. She asked him what was wrong and Norman finally found the words he could not say before.

"She knew."

Iris looked down at him with a questionable look on her face. She didn't understand what Norman was trying to tell her. She told him that and he look back at her with shock written across his face. He found he could find the words to express what he meant again and wondered if she had really forgotten about their nights together. He let the paper fall out of his hands and she continue to look at him as if he had lost is mind. Norman sigh and gave into his impulse. Iris gave out a startled cry as his hands encircled her waist and he pulled her body to him. She was shocked at his actions and then gasped as his hands slip under her dress and found her legs. She stood there trembling as his hands ran up her legs and she braced her hands on his shoulders to keep from falling down. They stared at one another their breathing heavy as his hands continue to caress her legs and she found herself digging her nails into his shoulders. She gasped again as his hands found her thighs and parted them. His fingers began to stroke her through her underwear and a moan escaped from her mouth. The sound of her moan brought her back to reality and she snapped back to her senses. Her hands left his shoulders and she slapped him hard across his face. So shocked was Norman that he instantly let go of her and she slapped him again. Neither of them said anything to one another and the only sound in the room was their breathing. Shame and remorse filled Norman at what he had done to her. He had no right to touch her like that and she had not asked him to. He tried to apologize but she wouldn't hear it. He bent down and grabbed the paper on the floor. She stood there and he walked over to her and handed her the paper. Her eyes were still blazing at him but she took the paper from his hand. He watched as she read the paper and then look back at him. Shock was written across her face and she found that she couldn't speak. Iris closed her eyes as what Rose had written wash over her.

Rose had come home early that day and as she walk toward Norman's office her ears had been filled with their love making. She wrote in her letter how she had stood there hidden from view and listen as each moan and groan escaped their mouths. She had listen as Norman called out Iris's name and heard Iris's cry of release as she came in her husband's arms. She had stood there and heard them talking about making the guest room their meeting place. Rose had stood there hearing everything and never said a word to either of them. Iris open her eyes and felt her heart pounding against her chest. Rose had known and said nothing. She had allowed them to carry on their affair right under her own roof. Why? Iris found she couldn't answer that question. Her eyes found Norman watching her still and waiting for her to speak. Instead she said nothing and he watch as she walk over to the door and place her hand on the doorknob. With her back to him she told that she never wanted to hear about this again. He nodded his head even though she couldn't see him. She opened the door and slammed it behind her. He could hear her hurried footsteps as she ran down the hallway and then she was gone.

Norman's eyes opened as he awoke from his dream. His dream had been so real and he felt like he had really been back in his old home. Norman blinked back tears and tried to move his hand but he couldn't. His other senses took over and he realized that there were noises coming from above him. Justin's room. His eyes focus on the ceiling above him and to his horror he realized that he was hearing as the bedsprings squeak as Justin climbed onto his bed and onto some poor unsuspecting maid. His eyes burned with fury as he waited for the poor girl to start screaming and to hear her cries for help. He prayed to God to give him strength to endure what was coming next. He heard as the couple above him moved and waited for the screams to come. Instead his ears were filled with the noise of the bedsprings as Justin began to move against the woman beneath him. He heard as a woman's voice fill the air with her gasps and groans. Their was no screaming or cries for help. Norman blinked his eyes and found that he was holding his breath. He let his breathing return to normal but was confused to what he was hearing. The sounds above him were that of two lovers who had found each other again. There was silence for a moment and then he heard the bedsprings begin to squeak again under the weight of the lovers. Norman was shocked. Who was this woman that wasn't screaming out in terror and crying for help?

Bewildered he lay there and listen as the lovers began to move as one. He heard the headboard bang against the wall each time Justin thrust himself into the woman. He heard the woman's moans become louder with each movement between her and Justin. Her voice cried out for more and in the moment Norman realized who the woman was. Iris. Stun he prayed to God to let him die right then and there. The woman in Justin's bed was his own sister. And she wasn't screaming out in terror or crying for help like the maids. Why was that? Norman listened helplessly as he heard her cry out in pleasure as Justin move inside her. He heard Justin add his own moans to hers and knew without seeing that her legs were wrap tightly around her brother's waist. Norman was shock and revolt at what he was hearing above him. The noises they were making told him this wasn't their first time together. To his horror he realized that they must have been sleeping together back in their old house in Mintern. It was the only explanation for what he was hearing above him. Norman's eyes burn with fury was he heard their movements become faster and their voices got louder. Didn't they care if they got caught? Norman didn't think that they did because in the next moment he heard to his disgust as Justin came inside his sister calling out a name. "Irina". Norman had heard Justin call out this name as he pour himself into the maids. None of the maids in the house had this name and Norman had never known who this mysterious woman was until tonite. Justin's fantasy woman had been Iris. His own sister. As if confirming his thoughts he heard as Iris came calling out a man's name. "Alexei." Norman's eyes became larger as all the puzzle pieces came together and he curse himself for never realizing the obvious. That first night together Iris had told him she wasn't a virgin and Norman had wondered if Allan Bakersfield had been her lover. How stupid he had been. Iris had never gone to bed with Allan but Norman had convinced himself that she had. That was the only explanation for her calling out another man's name and not his own that night. He had idiotically convinced himself that Iris was crying out Allan's name. She wasn't. She was calling out the name of the man she love. Who had taken her virginity and he was the only man on her mind as she came in Norman's arms. Alexei was Justin. Her brother. Norman wanted to kill her right then and there. She had used him. Justin was away at school and she was hurting. He knew she was going through a rough time that year but he had never thought he would be used as a substitute for his "son". The bile came back to his throat as he wondered when her virginity had been taken. He had been so blind that he didn't even recognize the signs that they were lovers even back then. Norman's mind race to the past and he suddenly remembered the night before Justin left for school that first year. He had been sleeping and awoke to find Rose gone from their room. Before he could get his slippers on his feet she had return and climb into bed trembling. He had asked her what was wrong but she had just told him that she was concern about a sick relative they had. Norman had held her in his arms and Rose had gone back to sleep. Norman tried to shake his head "No" as the last puzzle pieces fell into place. Rose had known about Justin and Iris. She knew they were lovers and must of heard or seen them that night. But she had never told Norman. Why? Norman closed his eyes as he realized what Rose had done. She had never told him because she had hoped it was a one-time event. But Norman knew now that it wasn't a one-time event. They were lovers and had been for a long time. Norman couldn't understand why Rose had never told him. Why she never said anything when she saw the long looks and stares between Justin and Iris in Mintern. She had to have known then that they were still sleeping together. Now it finally dawned on him why she had never said anything. Rose had taken her revenge out on him for his affair by not saying a word about Justin and Iris. Her revenge had been cold and calculated. The noises above him began again and Norman closed his eyes. Rose had taken her revenge and now he and the rest of the world were going to pay the price.


End file.
